February 27, 2008

Two Little Ramblings

Just a couple little things that I want to get off my chest today...

To begin with - lets talk about work, baby. Let's talk about them and me, let's talk about... yeah, I was going for that Pretty Ricky song as reference here, but it didn't work for more than those two first lines. For the full effect, read that as if it were the lyrics to the song, and snap your fingers to keep the beat. Then you'll be able to feel like I did when I wrote that short segment of this post.

Anyway. I had demands, right. I was going to get them to put forth the date of the lay-off, meaning I get a few more days of pay, right?

Granted.

I demanded the pay be calculated as if I was working, including bonus payments I would receive had I been actually working.

Granted.

I demanded that the days I am not entitled to work, but still being paid, will also count as if I was working, meaning that I will get a full four weeks of vacation pay paid out in full in my final pay-check.

Granted.

Freakin' great! But, there's a catch. Mr. Ass-Hat the Union Rep called me up this morning... again! Well, he actually did the negotiations for me, and most of what I wanted came through, so I am obliged to take away the Ass-Hat name for him - let's just settle for Mr. Weenie-Hat instead - that's not quite as vulgar. So, Mr. Weenie-Hat called me up this morning to tell me of the good news that I just told you. I'm getting some money after all...

...but now they want me to work another week.

What the heck! I was so mentally prepared to do my last day of work tomorrow, so this really hit me in the gut like a wrecking ball. I so do not want to spend another minute in that place. On top of it all - next week is the worst working hours for me, when I work opening til closing every single day.

Well, I'm going to need the extra week's salary, so I can't really say no, can I? I got everything else I wanted, so I guess it all comes down as a fair enough deal.

Enough of work...

I gotta stop eating candy and other delightful treats again. See, I lost all that weight, partly because I started going to the gym, and in part because I almost entirely stopped eating chocolate, chips and various delicious pastries. I ate healthy stuff, even if it didn't taste quite as good - and my pounds rapidly dropped.

Now, I didn't go on a diet or anything... I just changed things around a little, and instead of mainly eating the fattening stuff, I brought that down to a respectable level, and replaced that with some of the more healthy food items around. I didn't keep track of things or anything, and I still gave myself a treat every now and then. Without that - you might just as well book me a permanent padded cell at the local insane asylum right away.

Now, I've noticed that I am starting to gain weight again. Despite still going to the gym. Of course, that is because I have started eating chocolate bars, chips and other things (including the tiny little cheesecakes I found last week... I'm going crazy on those right now).

Yep, I gotta stop.

Makes me think though - something I thought about many times, and still I am not able to figure this out...

Why is it that the healthier the food, the worse it tastes? And, the more fattening it is, the more you just want to stuff your face full of it and swallow it 'til it damn near makes you puke?

I wish veggies were tasty, and chocolate made me barf.

51 comments:

Knight said...

I think things taste a certain way to us because we associate it with something comforting. I actually don't like chocolate very much but chips do me in. I am fond of veggies but for some reason my head tells me they are not filling and I am less inclined to eat them when mac&cheese is near. We are really just screwing ourselves.

Anonymous said...

I don't have anything interesting to say this time, I'm sorry. But, I did want to ask - from your last post, which I just now read - you are fluent in Swedish? (I assume you are, but it's something I never thought about until you put up that picture of the sign.) Which do you speak at work and in your daily dealings with things? What do you speak when you talk to The One? Is Swedish or English the official language of Sweden?

Em

Jay said...

Veggies can be very tasty if you prepare them with some sugar and butter. Oh ... yeah, I see where that would actually be a problem.

Cool beans that they accepted all your demands! Even if you do have to work another week. You can just pretty much go through the motions that last week. haha

Leighann said...

I think it's great that they accepted all of your demands! I think I'd go to work that last week, but the amount of actual work I would do would be questionable.

Leighann said...

Good questions Em! I want to know the answers to those as well!

Jahooni said...

I need an assistant ;)~

I lost 2.5 lbs this morning. I don't know what I did yesterday to allow that. I don't think I ate one veggie. Gosh, what did I eat? bean burrito and 4 beers. that's it!

Liv said...

that last sentence. yes. that's it.

Anonymous said...

I'd like to say "I'm sorry" in advance because this is another long reply. Grab a drink and get comfy.

I'm glad you got what you wanted from your employer. That final week won't be so bad.

As for the food thing. We are programed to respond to the tastes of sweet, salt, fat, protein, and starch. We crave these tastes because our brains and bodies have a built in survival instinct to build reserves of minerals and energy.

In the natural world salt is a rare thing. Big jungle cats get their supply from the blood of their prey. Fat is also rare in nature. Sugar is more common in the form of fruits. Starch is the most common.

We rank items by taste according to the levels of what our body requires for survival. Since our instinct never shuts off we always crave those foods.

The problem is that we have used science to refine and concentrate everything to such a point that it is now dangerous to consume it.

If you tried to become a diabetic from chewing on sugar cane you'd be looking at a full time job. If you wanted to overdose by eating poppy seeds or chewing coca leaves it would be impossible.

White sugar, coffee, butter, white flour, cooking oil, chocolate, and cheese all go through a refining process so elaborate and complex that it reminds one of how products like crack cocaine or heroin are made. The foods we consume are "based" upon natural substances but are processed into highly concentrated artificial forms.

It does not help that for several hundred years chefs - and now food scientists - have refined the tastes of foods to make them even more attractive and marketable to our animal instincts.

If you feel a greater need to eat these foods lately it is because your "survival instinct" is kicking in. Losing your job and not having your female companion around has decreased your chances of survival and reproduction. Your subconscious animal mind has reacted with the primitive instinct to stockpile energy in anticipation of hard times.

If you want to stop craving the junk you'll need to do two things. Start looking for a new job. Start hitting on every girl you see. If you do both of these your snacking will drop off quickly. Everyone eats the "bad" stuff when they hit hard times. Nobody likes to admit it... We're all just animals.

Farmer*swife a/k/a Glass_Half_Full said...

Whoo-hoo! [Happy dance, break it down] Go Yo-UU! Do a Happy DANCE! Got your PAYCHECK! After next week...they can Kiss your @A-SS! LOL!

Speakin' of Sweden. Yes, me too. Tell us something in Swedish -- something cool we can tell all our friends. Oooooh, and a dirty curse word in Swedish! That way I can get away with it in front of my kids. Oh, and is "Svedka" from Sweden? (Vodka)

VEGGIES: Like Knight, I love them. I eat them left over for my late night snack. I eat chocolate....very, very, rarely. Although, if I really have a sweet tooth? I go all the way. Straight to Pillsbury canned Cream Cheese frosting.

But, I pretty much enjoy healthy eating. I'm the one who always chooses steamed veggies over the french fries.

R.E.H. said...

Knight: Oh, yes. I'll take a bag of chips over a bar of chocolate any day! But, I'm still kind of following my own rule of not buying the chips... because before I ate WAY too many potato chips in a week.

And, that's another thing... veggies do not fill you up. Eat a ton of them, and you still have a craving for some food! ;)

Emmeline: Yes, I am fluent in Swedish. Swede's are generally quite good at English, since it is taught by default in school here, but few of them are comfortable speaking the language... that's why I have always been the go-to guy when foreigners, who do not speak Swedish, come into the store.

So these days... I rarely speak English.

Jay: Exactly! You need the butter and sugar! hehe.

Yeah, I'm pleased with how that went - but boy will I ever go through the motions those last days. I'll just try to sneak off into the storage room and take a nap half the days I guess ;)

Leighann: Oh, the amount of work that I'll put in will certainly be questionable. I'll help the customers - they haven't done anything wrong (well, you know what I mean - they are idiots and all, but...). As for stocking, cleaning and organizing stuff... NAH!

See my answer to Emmeline on your curiousity on the Swedish language.

Jahooni: Bean burritos and beer! That sounds like a great diet! ... or ... think a steak burrito would do the same?

R.E.H. said...

Liv: It is... with all the research spent on useless stuff - why not scientifically try to alter the taste in veggies, so they taste like chocolate, but still provide all the nutrients they currently do?

Unsigned: I've got a glass of lemonade... guess that'll have to do ;)

I think there is some truth to what you're saying here. If you present a kid with a bowl of peas, or a bag of M&M's which is the kid going to choose? The M&M's of course - the question remains though... are we "taught" from early childhood that M&M's are tasty, and peas are healthy... creating a mental reaction that peas are not as tasty as the M&M's.

"Finish the peas, and I'll let you have an M&M!"

I think the part about craving sweets and fattening food when we're depressed is maybe a little off... but I am certainly willing to entertain the thought. It would sure explain the phenomena of overeating when depressed. And, why women choose to drown their sorrows with ice cream, and us guys going for a six-pack of beer when we don't want to face reality any more.

Farmer's Wife: Oh, I think I might actually walk into the office on that last day, pull my pants down and shove my buttocks right at my boss's face, sayin':

"Kiss THAT, babe! I'm outta here for good!"

Well... not really - I'm just not cut out for that kind of behavior, but it sure would be fun ;)

As for Swedish curse words... here are a couple to choose from:

Fan
Helvete
Djävlar
Fitta

In English, those would translate to:

Damn
Hell
Damn (actually... "Devils")
C*nt ... you might not want to use that last one ;) But, in Sweden it is frequently used as an exclamation - like if you hit your thumb with a hammer you might yell out "Ouch... Fitta that hurts!"

Or if you want to offend someone - call them "skitstövel", which means "shit-boot"... people are raunchy over here ;)

Svedka... sounds more like russian, czech or something eastern european to me. It's certainly not Swedish though.

Leighann said...

Naked Kate Hudson with cheesecake?

or

Naked Kate Hudson with a bowl of peas?

Jen said...

The way I see it your work situation is this: show up when you're supposed to, do a bit of work that which involves customers and leave when you're supposed to. I mean, I wouldn't put a whole load of effort into what you do your last week. Go through the motions, but not an ounce more. What are they gonna do if you don't do more? Fire you?

Anonymous said...

I am so happy for you R.E.H.!!!! Like everyone else has said, Don't work that hard! pace yourself REALLLLLLLLLLY slow, so you don't get winded. My own problem is Chocolate! I want it sooooo bad all the time!!

I am sticking to my one bar a week, but now I have turned to Chocolate Milk!

P.S. I would dedicated a lot more to ya also! LOL!!!

Single!

MrRyanO said...

Congrats on the negotiations! I may call you the next time I need shit done!

Karen said...

I was totally thinking of the Salt and Peppa song "Let's Talk About Sex" with your reference.

WTG on getting what you want from the company!

Farmer*swife a/k/a Glass_Half_Full said...

Only hit number two (comment)? Oh, I'm down tonight. But, alas [oh, do I go there again with the cliche word] I am down tonight. Daddy's goin' through a crap divorce with a "step mom" I (stupidly) loved and respected.

Thanks tons for the Swedish. Once I learn how to enunciate it all correctly I will gladly enjoy those terms.

Got any good one's you could teach me for the trial (can you believe a divorce is going to trial -- WTF).

Well, just cuz' she sucked at it...I will say, marriage is great. It's nice to have someone to come home to and bitch and fight and gripe with...and they "take it" cuz' they love you. And, they know "you'll take it too" when they dish it all out.

Speaking of relationships? Friday is around the corner. Did you ask "coffee shop" Gal out? I actually agree with anon get up on that horse or whatever and start going out, Guy. Then give us the scoop. (But, don't let us monopolize your time).

Happy Wednesday.

Anonymous said...

Yeah... What about that coffee shop girl? I want to hear how that turns out.

Glitterstim said...

Oh, how many times have I wished "veggies were tasty, and chocolate made me barf." I feel your pain!

Anonymous said...

Congrats on the work concessions!! Yes, you pay a bit with that last week of work, but I think you came out ahead. Simple fact that fat and sugar are what make most anything taste good. I just try not to overdo the crap food and exercise some. I'll let ya know how that one goes, LOL.

Good Swede curses, I seem to remember an exchange student taught me "Kanula" I think it was pronounced that way anyhow. It was supposed to be sex or f**cking or something like that. Sound familiar?

Take care bro!

FMD

Dana said...

Congratulations on getting your demands met! I know the extra week of work sucks, but it's also one more week of pay. Focusing on that will likely get you through it a bit easier.

You know I share your food woes - cheesecake is blissful!

Jodi said...

Sounds like things are working out for you at work.....That didn't make sense, did it? But I guess that's what I get for reading blogs at 3 in the morning...

Are you still going to the gym?

J.

Casdok said...

Glad to hear you got some joy from work, bummer about the extra week though.
And yes its alos a bummer the things we love eating are fattening.

Jay said...

wow those first lines really creeped me out!

i run alot, so weight isn't going to catch up to me!
muahahahaahaa!!

g-man said...

Congrats and condolences on the job front. that other week after being prepared has to suck.

I wish the same things with regard to chocolate and peas. I started back at the gym again, and am down 2 pounds. :)

Tequila Mockingbird said...

first of all, i think you need some hard, sweaty sexin' to work off all those cals and carbs.

second, sometimes you just hafta eat stuff that isnt yummy. i eat lean cuisines a lot for lunch and drink diet dr pepper and eat those little 100 calorie snack packs and uggggh i so want to eat naughty foods (come feed me cheesecake??!!) but i dont, because i dont want to look gross. at a certain point, looking delicious is more important than eating stuff that is delicious.

Tequila Mockingbird said...

(oh ps, i just read your reply to the "do you speak swedish", and now that i know you can speak swedish, i now REALLY want you to whisper dirty swedish things into my ear.)

Anonymous said...

Yeah, I'd say it is a fair compromise to work another week since they are meeting all of your demands. it does suck though cuz like you said, you were mentally prepared to only have one day left. But, the money will be handy.


I'm with you on the cutting out sweets business. It's getting hot here in Vegas and all I can think about is ice cream.

Newt said...

I found that brining my lunch to work helped. Not having cash in my wallet helps make it more difficult to run and grab a burger. And keeping nuts and dried fruit at work has help keep down the craving to buy a candy bar from the vending machine.

fiwa said...

That's great that they met all your demands. One more week sucks - but it will be over with quickly - specially if they're working you all damn day!

I am with you on the food - pretty much if I like it - it's bad for you in some way, shape or form.

Sparkling Red said...

Wow, it totally blows that you have to work another week. When you hate your job, all the money in the world doesn't make it any better.

Good luck with the vegetables!

Mike said...

What you're going to want to do is leave the chocolate in your cupboard open.

Then come back to it in a few weeks when it's crawling in insects.

That'll make u stop.

R.E.H. said...

Leighann: Naked Kate Hudson with cheesecake, please ;)

Jen: Yes, that's how I will do it. I will arrive in the morning - I will spend the hours and I'll do as little as humanly possible. Funny thing is, my boss goes on vacation next week, so she won't even be there my last week...

Single In The City: One chocolate bar a week - that's reasonable. I rmember a time when I didn't even want chocolate... not ever. I don't think I ate a single piece of chocolate for two years.

Oh, you would dedicate even more? I dared not ask for more than one day ;)

RockDog: Thanks. I might charge you a lot for my services, though... after all, I'm looking at unemployment at the moment ;)

Karen: Damn! I totally messed up, didn't I? Yes, it was the Salt n Peppa song I had in my head, and the lyrics would have worked like I meant them to. I did a search for the lyrics and got the one I mentioned, and thought - "Oh, I must remember that song all wrong... this doesn't work".

Too bad...

R.E.H. said...

Farmer's Wife: Sorry to hear about the divorce. Hope it doesn't get too ugly (though it doesn't sound good if it needs go to trial).

About coffee shop gal... well, I haven't been in there at all this week, so I haven't seen her ;)

Unsigned: I'll be sure to keep you all updated if and when anything happens with her ;)

Farmer's Wife (again): That puts you in central time, right?

Think I'll have to take a look at that movie, so I know what you are talking about ;)

And, "Fitta" is a very ugly word indeed... hehe - and can be used in either one of those ways. As in "Ouch... F**k", or "She's a c**t!" It's definition in a dictionary would be that of a vagina.

Blogget Jones: Yeah, it should really be like that... nature should encourage us to eat what's healthy, rather than the unhealthy stuff...

Fu Manchu Dad: Yeah, that last week is a killer.

Gym and reduced junk food is enough to lose quite a few pounds... I did it!

The word you refer to would be "Knulla" - you don't actually pronounce the A as in how you wrote it... the trick here is to audibly pronounce the K and the N at the beginning. Like Kh-Nulla ;)

It means to f*ck!

R.E.H. said...

Dana: Yes, the extra pay is why I agreed to work another week. Otherwise I would never have done it - but I need the bucks.

Cheesecake... mmmmh!

HoosierGirl5: Things are working out alright at work as well as at the gym - yes I still go to the gym regularly!

Casdok: Thanks. Yes, I don't think it's fair. I might have to enquire the powers that be on that one.

Jay Cam: Running away from the calories that attack you sounds like a brilliant idea actually. Why didn't I think of that? ;)

G-Man: Yeah, I was so looking forward to today having been my last day. Imagine, right now I would be sitting here all blissfull knowing I would never have to set foot in that place ever again!

Good for you on losing a couple pounds. Now, keep that up - going to the gym is actually fun once one gets into it.

R.E.H. said...

Tequila Mockingbird: I've actually heard that sex is not such a good way to burn fat after all... but I'm sure willing to put in the effort anyway ;)

I would never totally give up my treats. I need them as much as I need the air to breathe! And, it's all a vicious cycle - you shouldn't eat the treats if you want to be delicious looking, but when you look not so delicious it gives you all the more reason to eat the delicious treats.

Oh, and Swedish is SO NOT a sexy language. Nothing romantic going on there ;)

Pookie Sixx: Yeah, it's a fair deal to be honest - but it still blows!

Ice cream and summer days go well together... I can't wait for summer!

Newt: I try to bring lunch to work every day actually - when I don't I always end getting a pizza or a burger.

And, lately - instead of candy - we get fruit baskets at work, so we can grap an apple or a banana or something when the munchies set in.

Fiwa: Yeah, it had to be the worst week of all that I needed to put in extra.

And, imagine I got the same thing with women too - if I like them; they are bad for me in some way, shape or form ;)

Sparkling Red: No, the money sure doesn't make it better - but it makes it necessary. I simply need every penny I can squeeze out of them right now.

R.E.H. said...

Mike: Welcome!

I'll have to try that one. It'll either get me off the chocolate, or I'll develop a craving for insects as well.

(I hear they are nutritious)

Dianne said...

I'm thrilled you got all your demands and that extra week is no biggie - just one more week's pay with nothing to lose by going there except the hours.

I was thinking of you today, I had to stop by the giant retail black hole where I sometimes work some extra shifts and there appears to be an audit coming up and all the employees have to read and sign things and blah - blah - blah. Thanksfully it's only my extra money job or I'd be worried. The economy is sucking more and more each day over here.

Is it possible your weight gain is simply muscle mass now that you're working out again? Sounds right to me ;)

Guilty Secret said...

I ate 8 ferrero rocher and a sausage sandwich for breakfast this morning. But then, I always eat a load of crap for breakfast the morning after my birthday. Those presents need eating!

You're aware of what you need to do... just don't pout off doing it and you'll get back on track in no time :)

L.P. said...

i'm glad the negotitions went your way babes, but i still want to rip Mister Weenie-cap a new one, 'Kay?
i just thought of something fun i could do to you... errr.. with you and cheesecake. you get one guess.


yeah, that's what i had in mind. You sooooo smart....

R.E.H. said...

Dianne: Retail really is a black hole... I sure hope I don't have to get a job in retail ever again.

Muscle mass, eh? Yeah, I sort of think some of it actually has to do with that, but there is a bit more of a pout in the belly area again too, so I guess some of it went there again. Nothing like it used to be though, thankfully ;)

Guilty Secret: Day after b-day breakfast is always good. All that leftover cake and stuff that you figure is ready to be eaten first thing in the morning.

Hope you had a wonderful day yesterday!

Lakota Princess: I suppose the Ass-H... sorry, Weenie-Hat Union Rep could use a new asshole.

You, me and a giant cheesecake. Oh yes, baby!

Freakazojd said...

What? Do you live in Sweden?! Did you know I'm 1/2 Danish? Wild.

Anyway, I have some great vegetable recipes if you're interested. I LOVE vegetables. Now that I'm taking the time to prepare said veggies I love them more and more and miss the crap less and less. Although I DID scarf down too many mini cinnamon rolls (the bite sized kind) this week. I just have to ensure that they're not even in the house. At all. Because if they are, they WILL be eaten. :)

L.P. said...

Yay! With beer!
I have a surprise for you to cheer you up. What's metal, fur-lined and comes with a key?
Toss a coin to see who get's cuffed?

Guilty Secret said...

Thank you. I actually left my cake in the pub though - oops! I hope one of my siblings took it home :)

R.E.H. said...

Freakazojd: I was thinking you would be half Scandinavian of some sort - from the use of the word Farmor on your blog ;) Small world isn't it? ;)

Thanks for the offer of veggie recipes, but I really am as close to an anti-vegetarian as one can be (that's my term for a person who does not eat ANY vegetables at all).

I should learn, I know ;)

Lakota Princess: What's metal, fur-lined and comes with a key?

Hmm... a wind-up mechanical gorilla?

Or...

A chastity belt?

Guilty Secret: Hehe... not much chance of survival for a cake at the pub, I guess ;)

Tequila Mockingbird said...

then maybe you can whisper dirty things in english in my ear...

L.P. said...

awwww... REH!! ~pouting~
fine. i'll take my toys and attack some other boy who doesn't mention such horrid beastly devices such as .... gah.... i can barely even say it.... mechanical gorillas.

R.E.H. said...

Tequila Mockingbird: You have a deal!

Lakota Princess: What? What's wrong with mechanical gorillas?

Tequila Mockingbird said...

Mmmm good. i just had some drinking at stellas (two for ones and landon made me eat fried pickles... i feel gross, but they were Soooo delicious!!)

and guess what i'm doing in a couple of hours, BURLESQUE SHOW!!!!! I CANT WAAAAAIT... dude, if you were here, you could so come. see what youre missing out on?

R.E.H. said...

Tequila Mockingbird: Damn, that sounds like fun. The Burlesque Show at least - fried pickles I can do without ;)

Jill said...

Been there, done that! And like you, if I wouldn't treat myself, I would go insane!
The thing, with your treats, try to find healthier ones! Since I'm a chocolate addict, and a freaking normal bar is as calorific as my breakfast, I've found those 100 cal one that are great!
And have you tried new recipes?With spices? Or you not that good at cooking that either?