Work That Muscle!

I realized something today... don't ever slack off from gym for an extended period of time! It is pure terror when you return.

Because I had been working a lot, and I was pre-occupied mentally by thoughts of The One leaving for Asia, myself about to lose my job and adding to that the simple fact that I came down with a cold. Albeit a mild case of the sniffles, but enough to make me feel that going to the gym would be too strenuous for me - and subsequently not exactly be a healthy option. I am a strong believer that if you carry a virus in your system, working out is not going to be beneficial. Thus - I haven't been going there for two weeks. Oh, don't get me wrong - I wasn't sick for two weeks... laziness played a part in this.

I went today. I had hoped The One would go there with me, but she couldn't find the time. I agreed to meet my cousin Andy there instead - because I felt I really needed to get back on track with my work-out program.

Now, I did feel a little tired all day today because I haven't slept really well for quite some time. I have felt like that before, and the gym usually makes you feel so much better once you get started.

Not today!

Today was so hard and I didn't feel like I had an ounce of strength in my entire body. The weights I usually do seemed to weigh about twice as much as they used to. Not only was it much heavier... I didn't have the mental strength either - you know the part when your brain takes over and keeps yelling at you "you can do it! ONE MORE!!!". Instead - that same reptilian brain of mine would shout "Fuck that's heavy! NO WAY you can do this!", and I would give up.

I ended up using the same weights (I'm too much of a man to take any off) - but I had to succumb to the pressure and do less repetitions. Focused mainly on the pecs and the biceps today... those are the muscles that also strengthen a man's ego.

I was completely worn out after today. I took a rinse-off in the shower and climbed to the top bench in the sauna and sat down. I spoke to my cousin about the possibility of me moving away in the future. We talked about The One and her leaving, and we talked about a get together of cousins I'd been planning for later this month... which now looks like it won't happen.

We also talked about the fact that I had no strength at all left in my body after my two week leave of absence at the gym. Yeah, I carried a virus and all... but seriously - today was like it was the first time in my life I went to a gym.

Now, later. I'm thinking about how important it is to keep working on those muscles, and how quickly they start to decay if not being trained on a regular basis. And, I'm also thinking the brain is a muscle.

Here's where it gets interesting!

It's really very similar to working out at a gym - and equally important that you work out that muscle inside your cranium: The Brain.

If ever you decide to do some research on creative writing you will find that the one advice that you will continue to come across time and time again is this:

WRITE. WRITE. WRITE! ... and then WRITE some more!

If you do that... soon enough you will find that writing comes easily. Words start appearing on the page without you feeling like you have to coax them out of the deepest parts of your brain. They just flow out of your fingertips and onto the keyboard as easily as it is to think, fantasize and daydream.

And, does this not apply to all forms of brain functionality?

I'm thinking... my recent situation with The One, my job and everything. If I continue to think about these things and actually work on: A) Getting over The One. B) Accept the fact that she will not be here to smile that wonderful smile at me. C) Really focus on what it is that I want to do with my life, and D) Be happy!

Will my brain not after a while be able to do all these things naturally? Resulting in me feeling good about myself, and not have to force happy thoughts into my brain?

But, I would have to keep doing this on a daily basis. I could start easy... with the "Be Happy" part. Sitting down for fifteen minutes every day - repeating in my head "I am happy, I am happy". I can do them in tens. Ten repeats, then I can relax a little... and let that happy feeling wash over me. Do another ten "I am happy"'s and rest.

Yeah... this last part is stupid. But, think about it seriously. If you focus on making your brain think in a certain pattern, and experience a specific mood... would it no become easier and easier, and you would feel happy and content with your situation without much effort after a while.

I am going back to the gym on a regular basis from now on. No more slacking.

I am also looking to find a good work-out schedule for that twisted brain of mine.