All day today, I intended to go to the gym for a workout session in the evening. I haven't been going as often as I want to go lately, but today I was going for sure.
Then, finally, I get an answer from The One... after I had taken a wild stab in the dark and sent her the message I meant to go work out in the evening.
'I WANNA GO TOO', she texts me back.
Yesterday's massive error on my behalf may not have had as bad of an impact as I originally thought. Either that or she wants to see me so she can tell me to go to hell, and stay there for as long as she lives.
Well, we agree to meet up at the gym at around 7:15 PM. My mood has improved significantly knowing I would see her, so I could rectify my erroneous behaviour.
I park my car outside the gym at exactly 7:15, and as I check my cellphone I see I've gotten a message. I play music really loud when I drive my car, so I don't ever hear the ringing. I must be numb too, because when I'm in the car it doesn't help to turn vibrate on (you know, the thing they invented so girls would have an interest in a mechanical gadget, when cellphones were new - little did we expect us guys would enjoy it equally much).
'WANNA GET SOME ICE CREAM INSTEAD?' It reads.
I was going to text her back, but she rang me up before I sent it to her.
"I'm really tired today... don't know if I can work out."
"So... you want me to come over for ice cream, instead of going to the gym?", I ask.
"You can work out if you want... or we could get some Ben & Jerry's". She's got the hots for Ben & Jerry's. The look on her face when she gets a mouthful of 'Chocolate Fudge Brownie' is the most adorable thing in the world.
So... there I am. Parked outside the gym - where I had planned to be all day come this time. But, with yesterday on my mind, and her sounding all sweet on the phone, what could I possibly do?
Well, of course, Mr. I'llDoAnythingForTheWomanILove, hops back in the car and drives over to her place. We go buy ice cream, and end up watching TV in her couch... munching away on Ben & Jerry's and some chocolate covered Oreo's... it's a sacrilege. Health versus Slouch, and evil is the victor.
It was enjoyable though, and neither one of us mentioned yesterday. I figured that if she for some reason hadn't noticed my behaviour... why tell her I'd reacted so strongly?
She kind of teases me... you know. Little things. Not sexual, if that's what you're thinking, because if they were I would have jumped on top of her right then and there, dealing with the consequenses of my actions later. No, she kind of teases me with little jokes that are slightly mean - like, the fact I can't dance (we did - or attempted to do - some dancing there as she talked about her dance classes).
"You will never learn to do that", and she crashes back on the couch, looking away with a distant gaze.
She may be testing me in some way, or she may say these things for any number of other reasons... but there is definitely something going on. I just wish I could figure it out for sure.
Mostly, tonight was nice and cozy. And I'm back to square one - I have no idea where I stand with this woman. But, if I am to believe what she's told me outright - we are friends. Nothing more.
Fine. I'll be her friend... I'll be the best friend she's ever had, and maybe some day she'll come around.
October 24, 2007
The gym? Or Ben & Jerry's?
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10 comments:
Dude ... I'm sure you've explained this somewhere along the line on this blog, and I'm not trying to be a smartass, but I was wondering. Have you ever just like .. I don't know .. told her how you feel about here and maybe see what she says?
I have yet to meet a ben and jerry I didn't love more than the gym. Oh wait, there was that peach cobbler flavor, not very good. Too sweet.
I'm with Jay. Because from reading this girl's cues, I would think that she digs you. But I've had really close guy friends before that thought I was interested and I wasn't. I've just always gotten along better with dudes. Anyway... I'm glad you went for the ice cream. You can always work it off later. If you hadn't gone, you would have regretted it. :)
Ice cream is way better than working out my friend. Especially if it gets you more of an 'in' with your Lady Love.
Just keep up the good work, keep the friend thing up...she'll come around.
Good luck! Oh, and hey, I've got pictures of hot chicks on my page today.
Jay: I believe I touched upon it somewhere in my bloggings, yes. First time I told her, things went awry... wanted privacy, and I'm sure it was less than a second after I uttered the word love to her that someone came around and shoo'd us away from where we were sitting. That really fucked me up that day. I never got either yes or no from her that time, but we ended up not speaking to eachother for two weeks after (on account of an argument the day after).
Since, we've had the discussion a couple times, and she has told me that she does not have those feelings for me. Still... I can't just let her go yet.
Newt: Never tried the Peach Cobbler one. But, it has to be the Chocolate Fudge Brownie for me... gotta love that one.
Tink: I would think that she digs me too, from certain things she says and does - yet, she has told me that it is never going to happen during one of our talks.
She is a difficult woman to understand and read. I think that may be one of the reasons I like her so much... if that makes any sense.
Samantha: Yeah, I'll keep the friend thing up. And I sure hope you are right she'll come around.
Hot Chick Pics? I'll be right over.
Thanks for the comment, yah, it seems that it will be happy at some point. Just right now it blows.
And I'm sorry if I was too hard on you about "The one" I just want to save you some hurt. If indeed there will be any. But you know you more then me so, I trust you can take care of yourself.
Okay, it sounds to me as if she's stringing you along. Girls DO do that sometimes, even the 'nice' ones. It sounds like she enjoys your friendship but isn't that interested in taking it any further, but still wants to have fun and be flirty with you, not caring what it may be doing to your insides all the while. It seems to me that she doesn't care that much about how you feel (especially with the teasing - that is an old trick), and I think you'd be better off without her. But . . . that's just my opinion.
Em
Beautifully Profound: Don't worry about it. I can take it.
Emmeline: You are probably more right than I would like to admit. But, still... well, honestly - I don't know why I keep hanging on to my feelings for her. It's got to be that smile of hers...
Maybe, the way things are, I'd be better off without her. But if even there is the tiniest possibility... I'd be best off with her. Got to give it some more time... but I will try to be careful so as not to end up being too hurt.
Oh dear. 'The one' is messing you around bit time. You don't tell a guy you just want to be friends then call him up and say 'let's get icecream instead' and tease him all night (blantant flirting if you ask me).
Sounds like she doesn't know what she wants. It's not really fair to play with you while she tries to work it out though.
But you probably know all this and it doesn't make any difference to the way you feel now, does it? :(
Guilty Secret: I think you may very well have hit the nail on the head there.
She always has a hard time making decisions... took her a month do decide between two colors on her gymbag when we started going.
How long is it going to take for her to decide on a man to spend the rest of her life with???
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