Hollywood Hotties... Not So Hot?

Don't we all just look at the Hollywood people and gawk at their stunning beauty? Don't we all look at celebrities and wish we were as hot, sexy, beautiful and pretty as they are? Don't we all want these rich and famous beauties to glide underneath the covers of our homely beds at night and join us in their bare naked state of grace?

Well... it's time we started thinking twice about that.

I started thinking about this when I posted that sexy picture of Lindsay Lohan yesterday, and stated my desire that she be here to take care of poor little me as I lay here feeling all sick and under the weather. I posted this beautiful picture of her, and afterwards I come to think of another picture I'd seen of her... you know, from one of those times she was arrested.

Not so hot on that picture, now was she?

So, I'm thinking to myself. Are the Hollywood Hotties really as hot as we think they are? Or is it all just a scheme? Are we just being fooled by the tremendous skill of professional make-up artists and air-brushing techniques on their photos?

Let's have a quick look at some of those sought after Hollywood Hotties:

LINDSAY LOHAN:

Who better to begin with, than the girl who started this thought process in my mind?

Yes, I am re-posting that same image I posted yesterday, though I have now added a small image to the lower right side... is that the girl I wanted by my side? Or would she have made me even sicker than I was?

With no make-up on, and quite a... let's say... dumbfounded look about her - she does not remotely resemble the beautiful, sexy and scantily clad knock-out I posted a picture of yesterday.

This girl has made quite a few headlines over the past year or so, so it doesn't come to a surprise to many that she doesn't always look so stunning...

BRITNEY SPEARS:

And, here is the girl who's making more headlines than most people in Hollywood. She can only be compared to Paris Hilton, when it comes to scandalous reports.

Having taken the entire world by storm, not only because of her music - but because of her beauty... making every teenage girl wanna look just like her...

As you can see on my little "insert" picture there... I sure hope American teenagers do not attempt to look like dear old Britney anymore... that picture is outright scary.

Gives me nightmares to think about how many a time a guy like myself has looked at a picture of this girl... dreaming of how nice it would be to grab hold of her head and... STOP IT! Right there!

MADONNA:

Another girl who every teenager in the world wanted to look like... and I think the majority of them at least managed to take after her style of clothing, was Madonna.

In the 80's you couldn't get bigger than Madonna. She was holier than thou... even the pope would pale in comparison to this hot, HOT, HOT! chick.

While age has taken it's natural course on her, the insert pic there surely must make you seriously doubt she ever had IT.

Oh, boy... and even I used to think she must be the sexiest thing alive. Right now... thank god I never got around to marrying her like I always said I would do... oh, yes! All that I needed was to meet her, and she'd be mine...

SHARON STONE:

When Basic Instinct was launched onto theatres across America in 1992, there was no question who was the hottest Hollywood Hottie of the day. It was Sharon "Parting Legs" Stone.

Every single man who ever went to see that movie left with a massive protrusion in their pants, and quite often a wet spot in the theatre seat. The time I went to see the movie was a different story - my gawking was ruined, and I wasn't even given the pleasure of leaving afterwards with a healthy boner... I may, or may not, tell you guys about that story some time.

I did see her on some interview shortly after the film was shot, where she had not been very successful with her make-up, so I've never been one of those to say that Ms. Stone is a true sex-bomb though.

CAMERON DIAZ:

This girl actually pains me to include in the list. I saw her on Actors Studio a while back, and I think I almost fell in love with her then.

She, of course, wore make-up there - but she seemed so wholesome and natural. Of the girls I picked for this blog, she is, however, the one who's the least ugly on the insert pic... but that's not to say she's a top notch head-spinning hottie.

Pretty darn average looking with a quirky smile...

Cameron is and will always be respected by me for her acting skills, and I will always remember that Actors Studio interview I saw and think of her as a Hollywood Starlet who does not think of herself as a better person than you and me... and she will be beautiful just for that.

So...

What do I want to say by writing this? Do I want to tell you all that they are butt ugly?

No...

I believe that they are good looking, but I believe so are we. The insert pictures chosen here are no more representative of their true looks than the hot stuff pics. I actually had to search for a while to find a picture of Britney's bald head where it wasn't obvious she actually has a very pretty face...

Thing is... We just don't have access (nor the money) to look as hot as they do when they walk on that red carpet. It is time that we allow ourselves to feel good about how we look, and realize we can be just as stunning as the rich and famous...

So, lets take a minute and look at ourselves in the mirror... imagine having Lindsay Lohan's stylist here to fix us all up...

*imagining*

I think I may be the sexiest guy on the planet!