A Letter to 13 Year Old Me

When it rains, it pours. I've been tagged again.

This time it is actually a quite interesting meme I've been asked to do, courtesy of Tequila Mockingbird. This meme asks me to write a letter to myself at the age of 13. Now, if only I could actually get that letter delivered to me back in 1983 this would be the best thing that ever happened to me...

As is the norm about meme's there are rules. Link to the person who tagged you (see above), do the meme (which in this case is write a letter to a 13 year old you), and tag another 5 people to do the meme.

Now, seriously. I don't know about tagging 5(!) other people. That makes for a lot of meme's you know. 1 person starts, tags 5. These 5 each tag another 5 and then there are 25 doing the meme. They each tag 5 and boom! 125 people have to do the meme. When these 125 follow the rules and in turn tag another 625 people things are beginning to spiral out of control. Shall we calculate how many will be tagged in round 6?

I will propose a different solution at the end of my meme, today. Sorry for not obeying the rules completely ;)

Enough of the rambling... let's write a letter!

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Dear 13 Year Old R.E.H.

I know you don't like to listen to other people telling you what to do. But, this is me talking here. Yes, me! As in You Yourself!

Confusing?

Betcha it is. Imagine me having to write this letter, huh? There are a million things I would like to tell you (me?) - some of it good, some of it not so good... well, sorry to say - most of it not so good.

You're not fooling me. I know you're sitting there reading this all smug and know-it-all. I know - I was you, remember. So, cut the bullshit, and for once listen to a responsible adult.

Ok, so listen up. Don't know how far into the 13th year of your life you've gotten, and I can't recall when exactly this thing happened. But, there is this girl you will soon find yourself quite smitten by. Yeah, the blond one. The one who every guy in school wants to kiss. You'll find a couple of years down the line that kissing is not what's on either your or their minds... you have just started to be curious about it... Yes, I'm talking about screwing her, ok. And, just for the record - play your cards right and you'll end up banging her at some point. At least make sure that happens ok, because she's pretty darn good at it.

But. Do not under any circumstances fall in love with her! That's an order. She will end up hurting you like you never thought was humanly possible, ok. Screw her... once or twice... hell, as much as you want - just don't ever let her get to your heart. She'll rip it out and throw it away.

What I just told you is the single most important thing you will ever hear, ok.

There is another really important thing I need you to pay attention to. On New Year's eve as 1988 becomes 1989 - for fuck's sake! Understand that no Pizza place is open after 3 at night, ok. Get a fucking sandwich or whatever out of the fridge at that party you're at - don't fucking get in the car, ok?

This event is likely not to happen anyway if you heed this warning. That cool acting school you want to go to starting in 1987... not worth it. The teacher is a drunk.

Wait! No, you should go anyway - just don't expect anything from school itself. I do want some of the memories from these days - had a fucking blast over there. Lotsa partying and lotsa girls - but do try to take more advantage of it... and never mind that pen-pal girl. She'll just end up cheating on you. If you choose a different path, that is ok too. Just make sure you have the time of your life right then and there, ok. College years do not return - they truly are the best years you will ever experience.

And, dude! Keep on writing. Yeah, I know - you're thinking "what could possibly stop me from doing that? I'll be writing forever!". Well, the blond I told you about will become one of the factors that make you stop if you let her.

But, do make sure to have some time over for sports and exercising as well. Yeah, I know - you think it's lame! Writing is your calling in life and all - but it would really do you some good, and save you a lot of trouble later on in life, ok. Besides, a few years from now you will have found that sports are a lot of fun... only you'll be too old to participate in them at that time. If you start now, maybe you can become a professional baseball player - that's one of the dreams you'll be having later on in life. Sign up with the Braves, if you succeed ok. The Braves rule!

Yeah, yeah... Hollywood is calling. But, you need to understand that whatever you decide takes a lot of hard work and determination. It's not going to happen as easy as you think. Get that through your thick skull once and for all. Work! Work! Work!

Don't wanna?

Let me tell you where I am now. I have a small apartment where I live all by myself (sounds great to a 13 year old, doesn't it?). I work at a furniture store for damn near minimum wage, and can barely afford to do something fun every once in a while. The one movie I have made to date probably qualifies as the worst film ever shot (and has thankfully been seen by very few). There is this documentary that turned out quite well - though you lost your rights to that one. The dream is still there kid - I just didn't put in the effort to give me a chance of reaching that goal. Change that for me, will you? If we don't succeed, we'll at least feel better about ourselves because... well, dammit! We tried! We did our best, didn't we?

One more thing... nicotine... don't ever fucking start ok - one year from now you're gonna think it's the coolest thing in the world to be smokin' and what not... it's not cool - it's just plain and simple stupid, ok?

Now, good luck, kid. Mostly you'll turn out ok - but do think seriously about what I wrote here, and our life will probably be just perfect!

Fuck! Can't let this opportunity pass me by. Play the lottery on Dec. 5th 2007. If you haven't earned your millions yet... this is your chance. The numbers for that day will be [this part has been removed by the author to protect his younger self from you guys playing his numbers]. Don't tell anyone, ok?

Sincerely
The Future You

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I'll just have to send this through the time-portal as is. There are about a thousand more things I'd like to tell myself, but this'll have to do. This meme is pretty much like writing an actual letter for me. First of all - I don't know when to stop. Second - I am never satisfied with what I wrote. Third - I always feel I have forgotten something of the utmost importance.

So... it is time to reveal my revolutionary idea on "tagging" others to do this meme. Below I will list the numbers 1 through 5. To begin with, these spaces will be empty...

Now! YOU decide if you want to be tagged with this meme. If you want to do it - let me know with a comment here, and then I'll update this page with your blog name and a link to it - and you will then have been officially tagged.

I encourage you to do it... this one is quite different and fun - although a bit difficult.

Tagging Volunteers:

1. Sparkling Red at No More Casual Nonchalance
2. Mary P. Jones at A Room Of Mama's Own
3. Emmeline at Why The Sky Is Blue...
4. Karen at Smiling Through It All
5. Brunhilda at Look... I'll Pay You For It

Tagging complete!

No More Volunteers!

Thank You for volunteering ;)