Reflecting on "Rubicon Heart"

I had meant to post this yesterday, but I've been working really hard the last few days, and trying to go to the gym after work. This has resulted in me leaving for work at 8 AM and returning home after 10PM the last 3 days. Add to that reading up on some of your blogs out there, posting the WWC on Tuesday... well, I've simply not had the time to sit down and write this thing.

Well... the good thing is that I've really had some time to reflect on the whole thing.

Like I mentioned in the WWC post, after I had clicked the "PUBLISH POST" button to fast forward what I had written into the blogosphere, where you all could read it, I got a little frightened. I think that is just one of many words that could describe how I felt. Frightened, nervous, panicked, terrified, worried and... and Fucking Great!

I didn't quite know how you people would react to it, so sitting there - waiting for comments to start appearing was a very anxious time. Then, I saw you people giving me positive feedback and kind words... and I started to think it really was the right decision.

Again... Thank You all very much for commenting on that one (and all other posts too of course).

I think I need to explain once more. Although I did say so in that Introduction, I think it does require a small reminder.

The "Rubicon Heart" story is not going to be about that part of my life. It will focus on my love life only, and the reason I started it off like that was because I believe many of the decisions I have made in my relationships are direct results of this life I've had.

So... while the opening installment was very dark and depressive - not all of "Rubicon Heart" is going to be like that. Some parts will even be quite comical (believe me, I've had some strange girlfriends in my days).

Another thing that I thought I might mention is that the introduction was very personal, and written with me being a very real and present person - like a letter. This is because it was meant very much as an introduction to any novel. The actual "Rubicon Heart" story, will be written a little more with a fictional prose to it - a story-telling mode. This is because I believe I should actually try to step outside of myself and have a look at what happened from... sort of... an out-of-body-experience perspective (isn't that one of the strangest explanations you ever heard?)

What do you people think of that? (Not that it matters much - I'll write it as I want to anyway, but still nice to know)

Finally, I want to not only thank you for your concern and support. I found that many of you commented on my writing style, and that the read was compelling and moving and gripping. That means a lot to me too. Because, as I have mentioned here before - not only do I want to pour my heart onto my blog, I also want you The Readers to be entertained while reading what I've written.

Some of you even hinted at this being published. Those are big words, and I very much appreciate them - however, I would rather this thing stay hidden here on this blog where only my blog-friends will read it. If it were to be published, I don't think I'd be entirely comfortable with it.

I will probably post new installments on a weekly or bi-weekly basis. It all depends on how much time I have, and what my mood tells me to do. I scrapped the idea of having any form of deadline, as I thought it was in the best interest of the story that it be developed in its own time.

The next installment (can't leave you without an appetizer, can I?) will tell the story of when I met whom I've been referring to as My First Love. I think for story telling purposes I will give her an actual name in the story (though not her real name, of course).

Apart from this - everything will continue as usual here on Ramblings of a Madman - with a dark sense of humor and whatever else interesting I come up with to post.

Thank You all for tuning in!